'Along For The Ride'

Finally, a movie from this decade! But wait, it's a Patrick Swayze movie from this decade. Damn!

Along For The Ride is a title that, to me, suggests some kind of crazy eighteen wheeler hijacking adventure. The kind of movie you fall asleep drunk to after a long night out at Hooter's with your racing buddies. In other words, my hopes for an exciting, fun-filled addition to the Random Movie Project had become somewhat inflated. Well, about halfway into the credits, sometime after I saw the names of Melanie Griffith and Penelope Ann Miller, I realized this wasn't to be. I guess it's just hard to imagine a Patrick Swayze movie where he's not either: A. Invisible; B. Dancing with Jennifer Grey; C. Ripping people's throats out; or D. Saying things like, "I know you want me so bad it's like acid in your mouth man. But not this time, Johnny."

Nope. Not this time, Johnny.






















Along For The Ride (2000)
Written and Directed by John Kaye


Summary:

Along For The Ride is the U.S. video title for a movie that was originally called Forever Lulu. I guess someone said, "Hey, maybe we could sell more copies if we actually made this thing sound like a proper Swayze movie and less like a show on Nickelodeon." Because "Forever Lulu" sounds more like what the movie really is, a loopy comedic love story.

Ben Clifton (Patrick Swayze) is a financially successful, yet personally and artistically unhappy scriptwriter in Hollywood. After a draft of his latest project gets rejected he gets a surprise phone call from his wild, schizophrenic college sweetheart, Lulu McAfee (Melanie Griffith). Back in the day, they were crazy in love. He was going to write the great American novel while she acted like a loony sex-starved banshee. It turns out that they split after she was admitted into a psychiatric home seventeen years earlier, and that's where she's been ever since. Though still somewhat ill, she left the home so she could find Ben, who is now unhappily married to his psychologist wife, Claire (Penelope Ann Miller). After finding Ben, she begs him to go on this road trip across the desert in his black 2000 Mustang (not the classic Pontiac or whatever that is on the poster. I don't know what the deal is with that). He agrees, but only so he can take her back to her doctors. Along the way, however, she drops a bombshell on ol' Ben. Right before they split, she had gotten pregnant and had to give the baby up for adoption and she thinks they ought to give the kid a visit. The boy, Martin, now aged seventeen years and played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt (who also played "Tommy" on 3rd Rock From the Sun and that kid in Angels In The Outfield, and who I always confuse for that other kid who played "Russ" in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation and Darlene's boyfriend on Roseanne; which is all the more confusing to me since Joseph Gordon-Levitt was ALSO on several episodes of Roseanne) now lives with his adoptive parents in Madison, Wisconsin.

Well after about an hour of scenes of Ben talking on his cell phone to his angry wife (which seemed to eat up about 80% of the film stock) and Lulu making wild passes at a very stoic, unresponsive Ben in motel rooms and swimming pools, they finally get to their hotel in Madison. By this time we also now know that Ben and his wife had also had a child who died from Leukemia. Anyway, after checking in to the hotel, Ben encounters his wife who had flown out there to intercept them. It all culminates into a tense moment to say the least, especially with crazy-ass Lulu hanging on his arm wanting to know who the angry chick is. After everything settles down, they all agree to disagree long enough to go visit the biological son. However, once they arrive, the kid pretty much rejects his parents and calls Lulu "crazy." She leaves the dinner table and runs out of the house. Luckily, Ben knows right where to find her. You see, on the way to the kid's house, they passed a movie theater showing the classic film, The Hustler, a movie both Lulu and Ben know by heart since it was their favorite way back when. We see them both watching the movie on TV earlier in the story quoting all the lines; Ben at his home, and Lulu still in her psych home. When they get there, Martin, who already apologized to Ben, and wants to make things right with his biological mom, asks if he can go in there to talk to her alone. They both apologize to eachother and everyone is happy.

Flash forward nine months later, and Lulu is happily moving into her own house and gets a package in the mail. It's a new novel written by Ben Clifton based on their adventure. She opens it to find her name in the dedication.

Impressions:

You know what, I liked this movie. Sure it's really cheesy and kept losing focus, especially at the end when it goes from being a tale of resisting temptation to rekindle a wild, passionate love affair with an old flame to being about a kid meeting his biological parents. But it was really well acted and the pacing was just punchy enough to keep your interest. I have to ask, though; what's the deal with Patrick Swayze's face? Have you seen him in the last ten years? If not, don't feel bad. There's a perfectly good explanation if you haven't. I'm just saying that it looks really weird now. Well, by "now" I mean in 2000. He has this permanent sourpuss expression that you just want to slap off of him, but won't for fear of having your, well... throat ripped out. If you've seen Roadhouse, you know what I mean. He knows Tai Chi. On the other hand, we have Melanie Griffith who's still perfectly suited for the gaze of human eyes and Penelope Ann Miller who also is not hideous.

By the way, if you Googled the title of this movie and came across my review while amazon.com is open on another browser window, with the "buy it now" button beckoning you to click, and you're curious as to why I mainly focus on how ugly or attractive the actors are, I'm sorry.

Next week's movie: Page 369, Line 37.